Showing posts with label Kate Brebner Griffin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kate Brebner Griffin. Show all posts

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Read me.

Hello there. I thought I'd write a little blogging postcard, if you will, now that the real author is back in town. 

I must admit I was very surprised at how addictive and even enjoyable filling in for Eliza was. It was also quite kind of her to let me run wild on her project, so thanks for that. I probably owe her slurpee for finding a relatively productive way to pass some time, and you too for actually reading it*.

In my absence from daily blogging, I have been thinking a lot about ATTENTION. 

There is no doubt that everybody needs it, to a certain degree. In these modern times we have oh so many ways to get it.
It's no secret the internet gives anyone who wants it an easily accessible platform to project anything we damn well please to friends and strangers alike. I'm doing it right now. News and current affairs programs enjoy shoving THE LATEST STUDIES down our throats about how reliant 'the youth today' are on the horror of SOCIAL NETWORKING SITES. 
I am the first to admit, like anything, there are definitely legitimate dangers to the internet. Like many other facets of our lives, having balance and common sense are vital. 
The all-too-easy way to post every photo or update all your pals makes it easy to advertise how amazingly fantastic one's own life is. I am as happy as anyone when good things happen, it's the egotism that often comes along with it that is dangerous. The response to the general conceited tone of Social Networking these days is where the trouble begins. The emotional pendulum can swing quickly online. This is the heart of the Social Networking Issue that sends my brain into very complicated, scout style knots.

Where is the distinction between attention-grabbing stunts and real asking for help?

This is something that gets me into a true state of confusion often, my brain has an elaborate argument every time I see one of these extremely emotive status'. 
Initial reaction: stop trying to get attention

After thought: what if this is legit?

There tend to be two categories for these sorts of displays. The first kind; where people proclaim in broad sweeping statements how absolutely terrible their life is in every way, to evoke sympathy in fellow friends, and revel in how bad their lives are. Or the second; the kind which are not necessarily the most dramatic, but have a definite dark undertone to them, posted under the belief that an internet platform is the only forum where they will actually be noticed.  

The difference between the first type and the second is significant. Unfortunately this doesn't mean that it's easy to distinguish which type a particular post falls into.  
And regardless of the motivation, there is a level of responsibility upon those who read it, like it or not. I feel super duper uncomfortable when I see any "fuck this" or "why do I even bother?" status'. There is no way of knowing with these ambiguous statements whether the author is upset about losing their phone or their father. 

I'm hesitant to respond to these posts. I don't want to encourage those who need to be the centre of 'drama' to feel important. But I don't want to ignore somebody who needs real support. It's tricky business, trying not to interfere when the culture is over sharing, while also trying to care about the people you know. I don't like buying into the Validation by Likes and Comments mentality many users of this media fall victim to. It's a fickle and superficial way to attest your self-worth.

So I am going to ask you, Y O U the charming, good-looking reader to do me a favour. If you post extremely ambiguous emotional status' (and even if you don't)or about your problems - just ask yourself when you're posting something 'would I yell this in public?' before you post it.
--> If you answer YES - step away from the social media. Looking for validation through 'likes' and comments won't fix the problem. It can even make it worse. Talk to a human, don't project it out into a faceless crowd and hope someone will notice. 

--> If you answer NO - please don't post it anyway, it's these attention grabbing antics that make spotting somebody who needs actual help almost impossible to find. They're wedged between fights with best friends, lost wallets and bad haircuts (not that these aren't legitimate problems).

Besides, if you're having such a fantastic or dreadful time as you may be claiming, logically you should be too darn busy with your life to be posting about it.

Enjoy the sunshine (if you're  indeed in the southern hemisphere)
K x

*NOTE: I will not be offering actual slurpees to anyone who claims they have been reading this, sorry pals.

Friday, 13 January 2012

Who wants a slice of Happiness pie?

For my final post of the week, I'm concentrating on HAPPINESS.


As it's Friday, there seems to be a common sense of celebration at the conclusion of the traditional working week, regardless of whether there is a day of work or a day off awaiting on Saturday. It's not ground-breaking but it's happiness alright.


A few slices of clarity (some of mine and some from friends) have also compelled me if you will to try and broach the topic without too many nauseating cliches becoming involved. 


The first slice was working out that western culture as a whole is utterly infatuated with the idea of happiness. It seems as though are whole lives are shaped around achieving a constant state of contentment. I am definitely in favour of contentment, but all day every day? It's just not going to happen, reality makes sure of that.


The second slice came courtesy of the combination of Bridget Jones's Diary and alcohol. The huge rush of empathy I felt towards Bridget as she realised that something in her life had to change, otherwise she would end up alone and found dead eaten by Alsations was notable. But, it wasn't a fear of DYING ALONE that I had to combat, I had to change something so I don't FEEL ALONE. Bingo! 
A more coherent version of this idea I saw this very morning in my friend's room.






  


The third slice of clarity was in the form of a conversation with another friend. She was telling me that she had come to the conclusion that happiness isn't an all consuming emotion. Happiness is not mutually exclusive to feeling insecure or angry or upset. I think she's spot on. 
I've found that notion to be very true, particularly since going on nursing placements. Most of the time I'm excited about helping patients, and also terrified of doing wrong by them. Seeing your patients in their situations often leaves me evaluating what I have to be thankful for that I never think about. I'm really happy and thankful to be able to walk, talk and eat without assistance for example. 


But going to such an extreme of a very ill person doesn't always get you feeling any better about your own life and in your own skin. Sometimes I wish that the broader definition of 'being happy' equated to how day to day life plays out. I'm happy because I got the last chocolate cannoli in the shop, or I got the green man the second I pressed the pedestrian button. Adding those instances up can make for a whole lot more happiness than maybe you realised you even had.


Gotye was definitely right, you can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness. So I'm not waiting around for some sort of euphoria to set in because one day I might finish my degrees, travel the world or eventually 'settle down'. So I'm taking all the smaller bits of happiness and putting them together for right now. 
Hope your weekend is a happy one (ha ha). K x