Paramedics Week 2: Survived

The only way to describe the course so far is "full on".

On Monday after my anatomy and physiology lectures I had induction for my special needs placement. The purpose of special needs placement is for health students to gain experience working with people with communication issues. There are groups of students going to a number of special needs school across Melbourne, where we will utilize and practice our communication skills helping out in the classroom. This means that the first time we encounter communication challenges, it won't be in a situation where someone's life depends on it.

My will be at the Berendale School, which is a high school of mild and moderately intellectually disabled students. The school itself is very small, about 150 students, and on the whole looks like like an ordinary high school. There are classrooms, desks, lockers and a gym. The school has a hydrotherapy pool as well as an industrial kitchen. The main goal for students at Berendale is to gain a certificate I qualification. The school is a registered training organisation, meaning are authorised to award tafe qualifications, and teach things like nail technology, community recreation, IT and hospitality courses as well as an academic curriculum. 

Most of the kids are intellectually impaired, meaning they have a well below average IQ but are otherwise developmentally normal. Some have other conditions like autism or Aspergers as well, but many are mentally between 4-10 years old mentally in adolescent bodies.

It's a pretty inspiring place. The idea is that their experiences of school be as close to "normal" as possible so that each student has the best chance of being able to meaningfully participate in the workplace and a social life as adults.

After induction, one of the Monash students, a guy named Chris, was offering lifts to the group from anywhere between the school and the suburb he lives in. Turns out he lives a few blocks from me, was happy to give me a lift home and gave me another lift home from uni during the week saving me about 30mins of travel time. I am always highly grateful for lifts home.

People in my course have been really friendly. Everyone wants to make friends and you see the same people over and over, which is very different to Arts. 

I've dropped one of my work shifts because I'm not coping with everything I've got on my plate. With the travel time from Frankston it makes it almost impossible to be punctual to that shift. I need to make my life a bit more manageable, so unfortunately for my bank balance, that just had to happen. I'm still feeling very new and over my head in the job. 

That being said, one week later and I'm not any more confident that this is the course I should be in. Mum and Dad very kindly offered to pay for my uniform but I declined. I am so uncertain about whether this course is the right fit for me that I don't want them shelling out for something I only use for 1month/6months/12months. If anyone's money is going to be wasted on this little tangent, it can be mine.  

I played golf this afternoon, which was lovely. My birthday is next Saturday and my high maintenance Grandmother arrives on Wednesday. This week felt a little less hectic, but I'm overwhelmed.

I'm coping, but only just. I wanted to be busier and now I am very busy. It is not the business that bothers me, it is the fact that I am very busy learning things that I apparently only have a lukewarm level of passion about. I don't think that will be anywhere near sufficient to last me through the degree let alone a very challenging career.

Maybe this is some kind of necessary learning curve that is helping to clear my head once and for all by pointing out that this choice really wasn't the best one. I really, honestly don't know what the best course of action is from here.